She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
