Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
