that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
