Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
