good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
