just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
