if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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