can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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