Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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