nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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