She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
