So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize