After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Randomize