new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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