Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
