He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
