That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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