so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
