Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
