Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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