shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
You smell like stripper and shame
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
