im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Send help, water and tortillas.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize