check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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