I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
