Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm both gender and math confused
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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