Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
