nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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