This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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