The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
