To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
