Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
