is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Randomize
