JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Barsexuality is the new black.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
