But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
