: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
