Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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