OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
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