4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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