I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize