btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
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