Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
