I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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