For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
