in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
We talked him into tasing himself.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
