That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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