Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
