dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
