from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
