Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
