We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
